I have a confession to make. 

I bit off more than I can chew. Put too much on my plate, and on the table. 

And did not think rationally. 

It has been two months since I sent out a newsletter. About one month since I edited my website. And even longer since I wrote a blog post and published it.

I thought about what I should be doing every day. I should automate my posts. I should post on twitter. I should just run a webinar. But I didnt. I didnt feel like it was coming from my heart, and Speak Your Inspiration is about being true and realizing what is going on inside causing you to react outside.

I didn’t want to make it seem like I was so busy and so happy. I was stuck deep inside a severe case of writers block and lack of inspiration. 

So, I let myself explore, hoping whatever I was going through would help you. After two months of digging deep I realized I was stuck between my dreams and my reality.

My reality was that I just moved to Boston from New York. I had a new gift (website design) but I felt lost in the yoga world. For the first time in my life, I was technically unemployed. The dreams I had of coming here and being a lead yoga teacher seemed far feched, especially at first. 
I needed money. And everyday as I applied for jobs I felt as if I was giving myself a spiritual beating. When asked, over and over again, “Why do you want to [insert job I never would want here]? I really wanted to say “I don’t even know what I want.”

I decided to ask myself the question as if I was a Speak Your Inspiration follower:

Dear Jessica,

I just moved to Boston from New York city two months ago. 
I feel like I failed myself. 
I wanted to move and teach. Freelance write. Get my name out there and really live a life I wanted to live. 
But the money is dripping away. My back is injured and yoga is painful. I feel really unconfident in my relationship with my boyfriend as my bank account goes down. 
I sub classes and people ask me where I teach, and I have nothing to say. 
I feel like I had such a great teaching career in New York but an unhappy life. Since I moved I am happier, much happier. But I miss teaching. 
I really do feel like I failed myself and my dreams. 
Please help me break through this.Thanks,Jessica

Dear Jessica, 

Give yourself a break. You didn’t fail, you realized reality, and it is good you did, so you can return to balance. 
Maybe your life right now is exactly what you need to prepare yourself to be a lead teacher, one that Boston has never seen.
You have to remember the best teachers are rational. Many people teach “you can have your dream now!” but can not answer your cries when you are down to your last penny. 
My advice? Get a job but keep your dreams. Have goals. What can you do to keep your dreams afloat? Can you devote 10 hours a week to web design and teach two classes a week? 
Take time to heal and refind the beauty in your yoga practice. When you feel best inside you will teach best.

With love,

Jessica

Writing to myself helped me uncover what I was trying to hide and open my mind to what is actually going on and what I needed to take action on. 

The results? I feel rejuvinated. 

I laugh, and I mean it. 

I got a paying job, one that actually works around my schedule. 

Website requests are coming in weekly and my portfolio is growing. 

I have been subbing yoga classes and will be teaching at South End Yoga weekly.

My email has been flooded with people asking for advice and I am so happy to help.

I feel better and more in touch with my true message.

If you have a question, need help, or want to connect, please write into the contact form. Whatever you write is confidential. It will be sent right to my email.