this is about listening to your heart, even when it comes to money
I just left a job fair in Manhattan called “How to Land a Job in International Development.” I am almost embarrassed to say I left early. But I guess I really am not, if I am saying it here.
I hold a masters degree in Middle Eastern Historical Studies with a focus on Iran pre and post revolution. My work is primarily based on how Amercia views the Middle East and than persuades the public to lobby behind a specific view (take veiling, for example) to turn the Middle East into “bad” and the U.S “good.” Last week I spent $11.99 on Time magazine because it had coverage of the Middle East during Arab Spring.
I spent $100,000 on 6 years of schooling and countless hours reading, writing and researching. I have so much passion that I can barley sit when conversation arises around any topic that relates to the Middle East.
But I walked out of a job fair on how to get a job in International Development. Why?
It didn’t take this seminar to show me that a career in International Development is not for me anymore. I knew that before I went into it. I think I knew that before I got my Masters. For both, I just promised myself ill follow through with my commitment and go with an open mind.
Unfortunately I learned that the career I desire is, as I anticipated, is hard to get. So even though I need the money and finding a career that relates to your degree is what I am “supposed” to do, I am not going to do it.
I don’t want to go into an entry level position where I’m an administrative assistant. I would like to travel, but apparently you need 7-10 years of feild expeirence. Which means you really need to work in a job for about 15 years before you are qualified. But first of course you need to get hired, which now that I’m thinking about it, people really should get paid for job searching because it can take up more time than a full time job.
So by the time I qualify, I will be a mom, and I will not be able to, nor will I want to, leave my kids and husband go to work in Saudi Arabia. I wanted that life when I was 20, but now that I am 25, I don’t anymore.
I don’t want to wake up one day and wonder where my life went for what I love the most.
I think a lot of times the jobs we stay stuck in are just because we are stuck and afraid to change (I am facing this now, but I will save that for another post). I remember when I was getting my degree the career I imagined was all about feeelance writing, researching what I want, consulting the big wigs and forming an amnesty international type organization.
That dream job and life is not really what my heart wants anymore. I know you know what my point is but I am going to say it: I want an easy life.
I want to always work and always be involved in something my heart believes in.
And I really believe if I am meant to do that work: consulting, research, writing, then I will do it my own way. And the dream will come true as long as I stay happy and as long as it is best for my life.
I know what working on what you love feels like. I can spend all day working on my website, reading up how to write more effectively, learning the tools that the most successful entrepreneurs have, etc.
The same goes for teaching yoga. I always want to be a better teacher: more driven, more confident. The works.
I am choosing to become a school teacher when I move to Boston this summer. I am excited to write my cover letter and tell people about my plans and how I am excited to still keep teaching yoga and mentoring, but work on paying off my loans at the same time.
I promsie to always have this enthuasiam when it comes to work.
So what I really got today out of the seminar is that my passion and love of the Middle East is here and vibrant, and I don’t need a job to prove it. I was so excited to come home and finish my teaching cover letter explaining why I have a specific masters degree but I rather use my knowledge and skills to teach.